In honor of our tremendous Government (and by tremendous, I’m talking about the size of it), I feel compelled to step out and write a screeching, shrill, high-pitched maniacal post, which has been brought on by wading through stacks of paperwork only to be later told our e-file was rejected. In all fairness, it was my fault (I typed in a wrong SSN), and yet the high-stress adrenaline that shot thru my veins after getting that notice put my computer, my windows, my husband, my hair and my children in imminent danger of being either tossed, shattered, battered, torn out and bounced off the deck, respectively.
So while my taxes *are* done, I still have a half gallon jar left of lingering wrath, so what better way to expend it than to write out a list of other things that also cause inexpressible amounts of non-joy. And what a lovely and biblical way to wrap up Easter weekend, no?
So, here’s my list. Feel free to add your own, because after all, misery *does* love company.
1) I can’t stand being told what to do. It’s true. I can’t help it. Generally if I’m told what to do by true authority (cops, my husband, God’s Word, etc) I will still submit, and even pretend to do it cheerfully (if I’m unable to muster up genuine assent), but in all other cases I simply don’t like it and usually accidentally go out of my way to thwart those who try to impose their will over my own. This includes Doctors, Nurses, School Officials, Librarians, Teachers and So-Called ‘Experts’ on any given subject.
2) I can’t stand it when my clothes are too tight. It’s unacceptable and it makes me extra wrathful because it means I have to go out of my way to eat less so they’ll fit again.
3) I can’t stand watching mothers screaming/yelling at their kids in public. It makes me angry. If they act like that out in public, how much more is spewed off in the privacy of their own homes? Mothers who do that look ridiculous, they humiliate their kids, and they make everybody around them uncomfortable
4) I can’t stand it when I lose my shoes
5) I can’t stand it when I step on something wet with my socks on
6) I absolutely detest being woke up out of a dead sleep by barking dogs
7) I can’t stand it when my neck and shoulders hurt
eight) I can’t stand watching bratty children scream at their parents because they want something at Walmart
9) I can’t stand trying to have logical conversations with people who are unreasonable.
10) I can’t stand being around phony people
11) I can’t stand living so far away from Charley and Jess, especially with little Eden getting here soon
12) I can’t stand it when I really really really want to keep reading but my nose and ears are sore because of my dumb glasses
13) I can’t stand seeing people get overly worked up about things they can’t do anything about – myself included. It’s so counter productive, yet it happens so often. I hate that
14) I can’t stand it when I hit the top of my head on something sharp. Am I the only one who almost goes into a rage when they get unexpectedly injured?
15) I can’t stand being biological. It’s disgusting. I’d rather be assembled of metal, plastic and wires. The fact that all of my body parts are constructed of colonies of billions of living cells grosses me out
16) I can’t stand it when I run out of coffee creamer
Well now! I feel tons better. And I must say that I am really happy that my dumb taxes are done and out of the way for the year. I’m also glad that I have far more things in my life to be happy about than my dumb ‘can’t stand’ list.
Ok…time for me finish getting packed up for my trip this Wednesday. I really hope that Coie and I do well at the Cincinnati convention. I sure am thankful for this RS gig. And I cannot WAIT to see all the friends who are showing up at this particular show.
PS I still can’t believe Jess and Charley bought my plane ticket to AK for July! This is going to be the best summer ever