I don't know how it happened but I've been nominated, and am a finalist, in a blog contest in the Best Humor category.  I think I am honored, but I am a bit confused… I mean honestly, Best Humor?  This is *not*
a humor blog.  This is a very serious place for discussion about
current events that have prophetic significance regarding goats and
their owners, and sometimes no-bake recipes.

Anyways, I am delighted that someone was kind enough to vote me in, but I wish they would have read TC before they voted.  Now that lady is funny, and she has better grammar and syntax structure than this train wreck.  As a matter of fact, I can think of about 17 blogs that are truly worthy of winning such a title. Or Douglas; golly that guy is funnier than practically anyone I ever met.  So if you go over there to vote, see if you can enter TC or Douglas in my stead.

Love Jenefer Igarashi Who Did Not Leave Michigan Yet And Is Hoping To Leave Within The Next 3 Hours

November 30th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

November 29th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

Oh for crying in the mud.  For the
last time, I am *not* preg– oh, what's the use?  You people won't
believe me anyways.  Please send all baby shower presents in the
form of Walmart gift cards.

Despite my phenominally ugly mood this week, I must tell you that today
held an exceptional bright spot when I went to the grocery store and
was able to load up on a plethora of curry.  While Michigan has my
contempt on account of its ridiculous compulsion to yeild itself to snow, I
do give it points for carrying an abundance of curry in its stores
(even tho they did not have medium or hot — mild still works nicely).

mmmmmmmmmmmmm… true love. 

November 29th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

…either that or I'm getting sick
again.  I've slept more in the last three days than I have in the
last month and a half. We head back down to TN (from MI) tuesday
morning.  It was weird to have snow.  I mean it actually snowed, as in big old fat snowflakes that were falling out of the sky.  None of my kids had ever seen that before.

Are you looking forward to Christmas?  I am dreading Christmas
because I hate spending money and we inevitably spend money.  I
also don't like getting presents.  It's all too expected. 
You must give presents and you must get presents.  But the thing
that I dislike the most about Christmas is that it is all done under
the guise of celebrating Christ; 98% of it really hasn't anything to do
with knowing or worshipping or proclaiming the Good News about Jesus
the Messiah.  It is just a season to be stressed. 

Bah Humbug. So tell me how you avoid Christmas drudgery.

November 27th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

My mom was one of those people, the ones who did everything
anyone asked her:

 “Can you come over
and help me clean my house since I’m sick?” 
“sure!”

“Can you bake 47000 cookies for the Christmas talent show?”  “sure!”

“Can you babysit my horrid screaming son for seven hours
while I shop?”  “sure!”

She never said “no” to anyone (including to us beastly children
– which was one of the reasons why we were so beastly).  I think she just wanted people to like
her.  But she always complained at length
about being “the type of person who just can’t say no”

It bugs me when I hear people say that.  I have no problem saying no.  Most the time, people just say “ok” when you
tell them no.  I don’t say no to
everything, just when I should.  The
worse case scenario would look something like this:

“Hey Jen, if you’re coming to the Church Christmas Banquet
can you help watch the two year olds?”

“nope”

“Really?”

“Truly”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why can’t you?”

“Well I could, but I
don’t want to”

“Why not?”

“Why are you asking?”

“Um. Because, I uh… Are you mad?”

“Mad? What? Why in
the world would you think that? No I’m not mad. 
What a silly question”

Awkward silence

Me, smiling amiably: “So
tell me what you and your husband did for your anniversary?”

And that’s that.  Even
the worse case scenario is totally no biggie. 
So, the moral of the story is: if you tell everybody that you can do
everything then go ahead and do everything and love doing it all, but then don’t complain
to everybody else that you’re the type of person who can’t say no.  Believe me, the ones asking you would rather
have you say “no”.   Try it. You’ll like
it.

November 25th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

The always lovely and gracious Gramma Sally, Mother In Law 

Extraordinaire, worked long and hard and hath chosen the main winner of the very last Christmas Magnetic Dressery For Thine Car contest.  She passed over anything too long to read.  She passed over any names that were too cool.  She passed over all the boring names like Anne, Marie, etc (sorry…. those were her words….) and then she found Beloved Lamb and liked that one because she said that learned what Rae means…. But then she kept reading and felt totally sorry for eyecorn being saddled with the unfortunate middle name of Fotiades.  She almost gave her a sympathy win, but continued reading and was stopped with awe by the regal name of Victoria Rose ; she said that she thought it was so lovely and royalty-ish that she briefly considered having another child so she could use it herself. Wow. But then, she found BeccaLoo’s comment and said that she HAD to pick that one because BeccaLoo flatly answered the question nice and simple.  So bingo presto…. We have our winner.  All protests and hate mail may be sent to her son at: Geoff@TheHomeschoolMagazine.com

Congrats BeccaLoo!  Email me (or ask your very cool momsie to email me) at JenIG@TheHomeschoolMagazine.com with your addy and your gift will be sent out promptly.

The other winner is Dandelion Seeds because all that whining should be worth something. Heh heh heh. Actually, the truth is that my daughter Coie said that she just MUST win and so there you have it

If you did not win a very cool www.ReasonForSeason.com Christmas Car Decoration, please go to their website and buy a box (see banner at the top of this page).  You can keep one for yourself and then pass out the extras to make people all warm and cozyish.

Have a superb Thanksgiving!  We have much to be thankful for.

November 23rd, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

When a family of eight drives twelve hours
ALL thru the night, and nobody sleeps, then when they reach gramma
sally's house at 6 in the morning, everbody in the car will come out looking like this:

November 23rd, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

….to gramma sally's we go.  We're
loading up the weirdsmobile and trekking across the southern plains,
upwards to Michigan.  Why would anyone want to live in Michigan?
No offense Spunkity doodle
Honestly, it gives me a cheese headach just thinking about it. 
They all talk like this (said in a high nasal whine): “hi, my nyame is
ayengella. iyell be yer way-triss. would you like a say-lid?” translation: “Hi my name is angela, i'll be your waitress, would you like a salad”.

When I get to Michigan I'll ask my mother in law to pick the winners
for our very last Christmas Magnetic Car Dressery contest (you can
still enter below in the Girls Are Weird post).  One of the winners will be CarleyRoss
because I wanted to see what the odds were that someone on blogger
would have the same ugly middle name as me.  And she does. So she
wins out of sympathy / empathy.  Ruth. like ew. Sounds like a dog
barking: “grrrrrr RUTH RUTH RUTH”

However, there will still be two other winners, because I am going to give someone one of my own personal extras.

Love Jenefer Igarashi Who Is Taking Applications For A Replacement Sister Since Gena Dumped Me For Our Company Lawyer On Account Of Said Lawyer Being So Much Smarter Than Me. (thanks Lynan for the idea of a substitute….)

November 21st, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

Being the week of
thanksgiving and all, I figured that tradition mandates some sort of
thankfulness discussion.  This is an imposition for several
reasons.  First of all, I don’t appreciate feeling obligated to satisfy tradition for tradition’s sake.  Second of all, I am forever constantly incessantly relentlessly persistently babbling about how blessed I am.  Dedicating One Day to be thankful seems backwards to me, since thankfullness should already be built in as a lifestyle and character trait.  So, as an expression of my non conformist disposition I am submitting a What I Am Not Thankful For list.  Feel free to add anything I missed.

I am not thankful for my bathroom scale.  It bothers me.  And it’s a dirty liar

I am not thankful for my over abundance of hair.  I
am not thankful for the hair on my chin, or my legs, on my big toes, or
for my bushy caterpillar eyebrows or for all the other places you don’t
want to know where I’m sprouting.

I am not thankful for how squishy my sides are.  Whenever I cross my arms I do not want to feel the gooze seeping thru my fingers under my ribcage.

I am not thankful for stretch marks.  I
know all sorts of sweetie-sprinkled angelic mothers who say that their
stretch marks are precious reminders of their beloved children.  I am not saying they aren't telling the truth, but I think they are total liars

I am not thankful for the times I cannot find my toenail clippers.  I have nearly severed my own ankles off with my ferocious overgrown toe-talons.  I am not thankful for the times I’ve had to resort to using scissors or teeth (mine or others) to de claw myself.

Love Jenefer Igarashi, Whose Anniversary Is Today On This Glorious Twentieth of November

November 20th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

We have about 40 thousand ladies here (and one poor lone web
guy) that flew in to TN for our TOS staff meeting.  wow.  Indescribable.
Girls are weird. And loud. And they eat a ton. 
And they always hug each other. 
And they get emotional about all sorts of oddities.  Like our Public Relations Director, for
instance, nearly started crying when our art team was able to create her a new
template that had the ‘look and feel of a steel barreled gun'.  Yep.  She
actually teared up. I like being a girl and all, but groups of girls are downright
scary and should really be avoided if at all possible.

We have ONE last contest for two people to win some
Christmas Magnetery (see banner at the top for a description of said Christmas Magnetery).  Which reminds me,
you know how I was whining about how I wanted one a couple entries back? Well, whining
works; Jim sent me one.  So I am now in
the ranks of the Christmas Magnetery Elite. 
Thanks Jim! I love it.

To enter this very last contest, tell me you middle
name.  That’s all you gotta do.

Love Jenefer Igarashi Who Has Not Seen the Back of Her
Eyelids In A Dangerously Long While

November 19th, 2005 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments