Jeneric Jeneralities ~ by JenIG

No, I am not referencing McCain’s stinging victory, I mean, sure, that may be another reason to panic, but I have a different story for you today.

So it’s been exceptionally hot the last couple of days, right?  Like, yesterday was 73 degrees.  It was so deliciously warm that I even slept with my window open and was gently awoken with a soft drumming of rain falling on the deck.  Lovely.  

See? It all started out well enough… so then I checked my email and there’s this alarming message from my favorite Ca chum asking, “Are you dead?  The entire Southeast has been ripped away by a series of killer tornadoes!”.  (In actuality it said, “Are you guys ok?  The news is reporting severe weather out there" – but this is my story, and I’ll tell it how I want to).

And as the light rain continued to pitter patter with charm, I emailed back saying how delightful the weather has been.  And then, about 15 minutes later, my blinds started clattering violently and sucked up against the screen.  What’s this?”  And then I happened to pull up CNN and saw, “TN Tornadoes Wreaking Havoc!”.  Yeeeeeps; Gulp.  The sky suddenly turned blackish and the house shook with thunder. So I flipped the radio on and heard, “Tornado warnings are in effect for East TN until 11”. 

That’s when I started running around the house blindly bumping into walls and knocking over all the furniture (not really, but it’s an enjoyable visual).   I told Coie, “Child, you are NOT going to work today”.  She, in return, rummaged around until she found my heart medication and popped the lid off for me. 

So then I go back to my bedroom and I hear something suspicious.  Really Suspicious.  In mounting panic I threw the window open to see if I was hearing what I thought I was hearing.  And sure enough.  I heard it.  All tornado attacks are preceded by the distinct ‘roar of a train’.  And there was no mistaking it.  I heard it.  I heard the train and it was getting louder and louder.  I wasn’t sure what to do.  I froze.  Really.  I simply froze.  And then I heard, “tooooooot     toooooooot”.  And then I remembered we live pretty close to the railroad track.  It was a real train.  Not a tornado train.  Talk about being minutes away from a full blown four valve blow out.

I’m much better now.  

After I was done panicking — about a half hour later — I was sitting around the table, while my kids ate breakfast, talking about government (yes, life snaps back to normal pretty quickly around these parts) and I asked them to name the three branches of government, and Coie pipes up , “Dairy, Meat, Vegetables”.  And with that, I encouraged her to go get ready for work.  Smart aleck.  How can one teach under those sorts of conditions? 

but in conclusion, my house is still standing, our poultry has not been swept skyward, our pond has not overflowed, and the wind stopped blowing.  So, just in case you were wondering, the tornadoes left us completely alone and unharmed. 

February 6th, 2008 - Posted in Uncategorized | | 0 Comments

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  1. Anonymous said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 10:30 am

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    Yeah, I was pretty bummed when I heard the train and ran outside to find no tornado…:-( I've had zero excitement this year…

  2. MOM said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 10:33 am

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    Ryann, how about you abandon yourself to the utter excitement of cleaning the bathroom.

    love, momsie

    ps if i ever find out you went outside during a storm again, i will injure you.

  3. UndertheSky said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 10:49 am


    OK, that was truly funny. I *am* so glad you are all OK though. :+)

    The roar!!

    :+) That is almost as good as the soap.

    :+) KATE

  4. kellieann said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 11:20 am

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    It was all mostly nothing here in middle TN too. Still, I stayed up until about 2:30 this morning listening to the weather people, just in case.

  5. SmallWorld said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 11:43 am

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    Wow! I missed the whole tornado warning thing. Whoops! I'm glad I didn't know because then I would have had to feel guilty because I refuse to go in my basement. Yuck.

  6. tnmomtomanyblessings said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 11:46 am

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    I am glad you were left unharmed. I went out alone just before the winds and the strong rains arrived and found myself at the dump hurling trash bags into the dumpster and getting rained upon like I've never been rained upon before. It wasn't lovely – I wasn't lovely but I did laugh. It was funny!

    SO we are also safe and dry…NOW : )


  7. byourlove1 said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 12:06 pm


    I'm so glad you guys are okay, I was watching the news, it looks really bad-a lot of people have lost their lives!


  8. Anonymous said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 12:33 pm

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    That's a little to close for comfort I'd say. Whew….and the three branches of government involve food? I need to get more political.


  9. wardssward said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 2:04 pm

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    Besides the roar of a train, another precursor to look for is the neighbor lady flying by your window on her bicycle. 🙂 The boys and I enjoyed your dramatic story. And, yes, I had been wondering how you guys were doing when I heard the news about the TN tornadoes. Glad you all survived!


  10. CTdittmar said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 3:40 pm

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    I can't help commenting when your humorous writing has left me grinning. A real train… you're too funny. Here in Hawaii, we had a monsoonisih type storm one night and I just kept thinking we were about to get blown off this island into the great Pacific. I hear the panic thing! Wonderful writing…

  11. Anonymous said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 4:01 pm

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    That must have been terrifying and hysterically funny all at once! (You sure have me ROFL!) I'm glad you are safe, though, (and you are making me have 2nd thoughts about moving to TN!)

    Hmmm…endless winter…or tornadoes? Yikes!

    God Bless,


  12. foxvalleyfamily said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 4:01 pm

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    Sorry… that last one was me!

  13. JenIG said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 4:11 pm

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    for the record… TN is not known for tornadoes. this was a total fluke for east tn (especially). so don't let that stop you from moving down here!

  14. drewsfamilytx said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 4:30 pm

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    Glad y'all are okay! I guess I need to watch the news more. See? You could've been Dorothified and I wouldn't have even known it! There is just no excuse for that…

    As to the branches of government, I thought they were deaf, blind and mute.

  15. BlessingsFromAbove said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 6:00 pm

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    That train thing happened to me too, only I was in South Dakota. We were there at Sturgis, a motorcycle rally. They were having a huge storm at the time—horrible winds, hail, etc. I was completely freaking out because I did not want to get swept up by a tornado, and I couldn’t understand how everyone else wasn’t a wreck like I was. The locals told me that the town has tornado sirens, so they don’t get worried until they hear them sound off. Well, we were walking to get some shelter, and I heard this siren go off. I start screaming “THE SIRENS, THE SIRENS’, and my husband looks at me as if I had completely lost my mind, and said “That’s a train, Michele, calm down!”


  16. Kelley said,

    on February 6th, 2008 at 6:52 pm

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    I could never live with you because you would make me crazy but I would love to be in the room when some of this stuff happens.

  17. Anonymous said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 8:37 am

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    I'm so glad that it was just The Little Engine That Could and not a freak of nature!


  18. Anonymous said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 2:20 pm

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    Too funny – great visuals. I have a funny non-tornado story too – I'll tell it sometime when I have a little more energy. Glad you're all safe and sound. Karen (bensrib)

  19. Ruth said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 2:46 pm

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    No one can tell it like you. Of course, I had some pretty funny visuals of you running through the house. I am ROTFL. It was just the funniest. I am glad to hear that everyone is ok there.


  20. KarenW said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 5:27 pm

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    We are having really warm weather too. Thankfully tornadoes are a rare thing here. My family in Alabama had one just a few miles from their homes. Scary! So glad you are safe.

  21. jess4him said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 6:42 pm

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    So I figured since you were so kind and left me a nice long comment on my blog, that I ought to do the same.

    First of all, I'm glad you're okay and wasn't thrown into North Carolina. Secondly, I thought Ryann's comment – and then your reply – were really great. Made me laugh. Out loud.

    I keep telling you, Alaska doesn't have tornadoes. You should move here and then you wouldn't have to be worried about tornadoes anymore. Or monsoons. Or the tribulation. Alaska gets none of those things. we're too far away.

    Of course, we DO get earthquakes (which are really just fun), lots of snow, moose in our back yards and plenty of big, huge fish to eat- typically NOT in our back yard, unless you live on the ocean- which, then you may have to worry about tsunamis. haha. i spelled that one right. haha. you can't correct me on that hard word that i just spelled right without the spell check.

  22. Jenig said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 9:05 pm

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    Jessica, that may have been the funniest comment i've ever gotten. "AK doesn't get tornadoes / Tribulation… it's too far away". that made me snort. loudly.

  23. blessingsundreamtof said,

    on February 7th, 2008 at 10:04 pm

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    So glad that y'all are okay!!! Very scary! However… the pedeling-bicycle-witch music from the Wiz of Oz played in my brain the whole time I read and giggled through your post!!! Are you sure that you don't have it subliminally playing??? 🙂

    Blessings, :)Michelle

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